Holy Cow, We're heading to Florida!

Yep, we are heading to the Mayo Clinic! Next Friday if you can believe it. Honestly, it doesn't even seem real to me yet. In one week I will be in Florida.

This could be it. Where we figure out what the hell is wrong with me and how to fix it. When I can drive again and go out with my friends and go back to Raleigh and vet school and get my life back. No more sling, pain meds, sleepless nights, attacks. Holy shit.

But the other side of that is terror. We have been disappointed so many times, what if it happens again. If Mayo can't figure it out, who can? I won't go in to the other what ifs I have.

I have to admit, I'm excited to have a weekend in Florida. Dixie has never seen the beach, so I'm gonna try to find a dog friendly beach for her.

I promise both Dixie and I will blog our experiences while we are there!

My concept of a soulmate is much broader than most

Most people think that a soulmate is a person who is perfect for you, who is your other half. I don't necessarily disagree with that, I just think that a soulmate can take many forms. For me, my soulmate has 4 feet, a tail and spots.

I know people will say that I am just a crazy dog lady but why can't a dog be your soulmate? I doubt there is any human who can do what she does for me. She gives me quality of life, confidence that I can go out and not be totally debilitated if I have an attack and she give me comfort. She always knows how I feel and she is always there for me. No one can celebrate like a dog does, no one can comfort like them either. She is my heart dog.

So many people flip out when I say that it won't break my heart if I don't get married. Don't get me wrong, I would love to find someone I loved enough to spend the rest of my life with. But I already have so many wonderful people and animals in my life and I continue to meet more.

It was a one step forward two step back kind of week.

I am being referred to the Mayo Clinic in Florida. We had a little snafu with insurance, but it was resolved and I should find out my appointment time and date this week. We have used up our resources here in NC and we still have no answers. Not to mention, we'll be in Florida! Mom, Dixie and I will make a stop in Charleston at my grandparents' house and possibly pick up my grandmother then head down there.

Unfortunately, I also went down hill this week. I thought things had leveled off again (I even mentioned it to my therapist) and was happy. Sunday afternoon I was working on some school work when, out of the blue, pain like I haven't felt before shot through my left chest. It sent me into tears immediately and Mom and I were trying to decide if we should go to the ER.

We decided not to since there is nothing they can do and it isn't worth the hours wait and 200$ co-pay for a pain injection that will wear off in a few hours. I took some more pain meds and laid down to just wait it out.

About 20 minutes in to this, Dixie started alerting that an attack was coming. I took my meds and she stayed by my side the entire time. It was really a short attack and not as severe as the ones where she wasn't there to alert. I am honestly so so amazingly thankful for my wonderful dog. She improves my quality of life in a way no one else can.

Today the pain is still there but I haven't had any more attacks. I can't use my arm at all any more since any movement makes the pain worse. It is kind of scary, I guess I just wasn't prepared to get this much worse this fast.

Please Vote for Lola and Laura

Vote for Lola and Laura!

I entered the picture below in BAD RAP's calendar contest this year. The top 12 get to be in their 2010 calendar and we would love to be one of those! All proceeds go to pit bull rescue and education.

Finally getting some forward motion

So we finally have some progress. Not towards a diagnosis but to the next level of diagnostic care. My PCP (who is wonderful and listens to me and Mom all the time and even lets us e-mail him)is referring me to the Mayo Clinic Diagnostic Division in Jacksonville Florida! Everyone in my family has heard nothing but wonderful things about them and the wonderful ladies on the Pets board I frequently shared some of their Mayo Clinic success stories with me. We really hope that this is the place that can figure me out so I can get back to life!

Dixie is doing absolutely wonderful in her training. We had a break through and are now planning on doing her certification test/performance in 2-3 weeks! She has been going with me to most places (all places if Dad or my Aunt Kay takes me) and I haven't had an attack in a few weeks! My physical therapist thinks it is because Dixie knows when I start getting too painful and will get agitated which alerts me that I need to stop before and attack is even set off. She also says I am much more relaxed when I have Dixie with me. CHeck out Dixie's blog to read more about her training.

I'm also "in class" now and I'm really enjoying it. I'm learning a lot of new things and it will be really useful in the future.

I've touched on this before, but I think one of the best things to come out of this illness is me figuring out what my calling really is. I was never 100% happy being a vet tech in a regular vet practice. Don't get me wrong, I loved the work but there was always something that was a little off when I sat down and thought about it. I realized that what I really truly love is behavior and training. Not tooting my own horn, but I have always been able to read animals and help them calm down. There were clients that would ask that I help with their "problem" dogs because they didn't get so stressed. Now that I know more, I know why that was. I want to help people work with their dogs that have behavior issues rather than dump them at a shelter or euthanize them.

Yea, its been a long time

So since I last updated, I saw a new pain doctor, which was the worst experience I've had witha doctor in a very long time (maybe ever!). He was condescending (no, the piercings on my chest do not imply I am an idiot), unprofessional and he didn't listen to what I said about my health, which results in me getting a medication that really screws with asthmatics that almost put me in the hospital (and would have if I had taken the full dose he prescibed!). So I'm going back to my first pain doctor that I trust.

I started physical therapy and it went really well! My therapist was wonderful and worked with my pain limitations. I have exercises I can do in the pool to make it less painful. They even asked me to bring Dixie when I come so they will know if we are pushing too hard and so I will be more relaxed.

Dixie's training is going really well. I've kind of slacked off the past 2 weeks, but we are getting back in to things.

I also start school (via distance ed) on Wednesday. I'm taking 6 classes and will have mostly completed my business and psychology majors.

I promise I will try to update more.

This is why I don't get my hopes up about doctors

Thursday Dixie was unable to go with us to my father's graduation. Unfortunately I had 2 separate attacks and severe heat exhaustion from trying to sleep off the attacks in the car with no A/C for a few hours. I now know how animals left in cars feel like and I can't imagine someone treating their dog that cruelly.

Friday I had an appointment with the orthopedic specialist who we all thought would be the one to figure me out. He didn't and gave up on me after an hour (a record). So we are seeing another doctor, but they can't get me in until October 13th!

It is really frustrating. I also realized that this upcoming week will mark 6 months since I first got sick. I certainly didn't think that this is how a seriously sore and swollen arm would work out.

This week is also going to be an intense training week for Dixie and I. I really need to get her certified sooner rather than later and I know she is up to a quicker pace. She also has a blog if anyone is interested in her journey to become a service dog.

Dixie's Blog